1/10/2003

Sat down
stared at the fire
looked away
looked back
closed my eyes
opened them
television off
no music
book closed
nothing
in my hand
or
up my sleeve
having arrived
at the end
of pretense
unable
to convince myself
anything I do
matters
in a world
renouncing
its best efforts
I gave up
keeping busy
for the sake
of appearances
and
took a seat
at
the great tumble
promising myself
I would get up
to vote
but that was all
anyone
should expect of me.